Noise. It’s ALWAYS going on. Even if you have all the electronic items off, there is still noise. You still hear cars, the refrigerator running, the air conditioner/heater, etc. I asked my husband what sounds he hears at night when he is hunting in Colorado; he said the wind or coyotes. In the mornings when he’s hunting, he will hear ground squirrels and birds. He said the most quiet it gets is when a storm is coming.

Wherever we go in our day-to-day lives, there are noises. When we are shopping, we hear overhead music, announcements, or people talking while waiting in line. You may be at a sporting event where people might not be happy about what’s going on and maybe they are yelling bad things, possibly cussing. You could be at home with your family watching a TV show, but the commercial shows things you don’t want your children to see.

However, we hear good things too! Riding in the car we put on Christian music. At some type of tournament or competition, you might hear people around you talk about how good a particular child did or how kind they are. At work, you might hear someone tell another person how nice someone is or they enjoy working with them.

So that brings me to the next thought…do you have “noise” inside your own head? I believe we all do; some good and bad; some positive and some negative. This noise can be anything from planning your day, deciding what you’re going to wear, accomplishments you want to achieve in the future or maybe things you didn’t achieve in the past.

In the morning, as soon as I wake up, even before me eyes open, my mind starts moving/making noise. I sometimes wonder where the thoughts come from. I’ve been paying more attention to the noises in my head. It’s almost like a conversation going on; me talking to myself back and forth. I may think “I’m going to go to the gym tonight, but then I hear myself say no you’re not. You’ll be too tired and lazy. You know you’ll give up.” And there are many other noises just like this one. There is not a time during our waking hours when the noise stops. I wish there was an off button so I could turn off all the noise.

In the Bible, even David had problems with noise/thoughts in his head. In Psalm 13:2 NIV he writes “How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart?”

I/We need to work on the kind of noises we have in our heads. The fact is we all face these problems. The majority of the time we do not realize what we are saying to ourselves. Here are some helpful things we can practice so the noises in our heads change from negative to positive:

1) Pay attention to what you are thinking about.
2) Ask yourself if it is positive. If not change the thought. Hebrews 3:1 says “fix your thoughts on Jesus”
3) Every time you think a bad or negative thought, do what Romans 12:2 says “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Think of what God says about that particular thought. As an example: You might say to yourself I’m so unattractive, but that is not what God thinks about us. In Psalm 139:14 God says “you are fearfully and wonderfully made.”
4) Replace the bad with good and negative with positive.

What are the noises/thoughts in your head?

A sure way to overcoming your fears and anxieties is in finding the source of your fears and being able to manage it. In dealing with any kinds of fears or anxieties, try to learn what is the real source of your fears and anxieties. Knowing what is causing your anxieties can go a long way in finding the solution.

A person can find the source of his or her own fears by doing some self-evaluation and also by talking to a professional. Asking yourself questions such as: “Why am I afraid” or “What is causing my anxiety” will lead you in the right direction in finding the source of your fears. Give it some time and eventually you will find the answers your looking for.

Once you find the true source of your fears, the next step is to find the solutions that will solve your problem. With the help of a professional, write down a list of possible techniques and solutions that you think will manage your fear and anxieties. The next step is to apply the techniques that you uncovered. Here is a brief list of some techniques you can use to help deal with your fears.

A good way to manage your worry is to challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your fearful or anxious, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense.

Be smart in how you deal with your fears and anxieties. Do not try to tackle everything all at once. When facing a current or upcoming task that overwhelms you with a lot of anxiety, break the task into a series of smaller steps. Completing these smaller tasks one at a time will make the stress more manageable and increases your chances of success.

Learn to take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. When the time comes, hopefully you will have learned the skills to deal with your situation.

Sometimes we encounter a scary situation that gets us all upset. When encountering these events, always remember to get all of the facts of the given situation. Gathering the facts can prevent us from relying on exaggerated and fearful assumptions. By focusing on the facts, a person can rely on what is reality and what is not.

In every anxiety-related situation you experience, begin to learn what works, what doesn’t work, and what you need to improve on in managing your fears and anxieties. For instance, you have a lot of anxiety and you decide to take a walk to help you feel better. The next time you feel anxious you can remind yourself that you got through it the last time by taking a walk. This will give you the confidence to manage your anxiety the next time around.

Many people try to get rid of their anxieties and fears without taking into consideration why they are afraid. The best way to get rid of your fears is to find those techniques that will manage the true source of your fears. If you can do this, then you should be able to overcome your fears and anxieties.

It is not easy for me to take a compliment or say something good about myself.  I was in counseling for quite some time before I could even say out loud “I matter”.  The first time my counselor had me say it, I cried.  I didn’t believe it.  I did not feel like I mattered to myself or anyone else.  It wasn’t because someone was mean to me or bad things had happened to me. It was what I believed of myself.  Many people, do not think good things of themselves. Here are just 4 things God says you are:

Loved/Chosen – I am greatly loved by God. Col. 3:12

Forgiven – I am forgiven of all my sins & washed in the Blood. Eph 1:17

Fearless – For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love and a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

Warrior – I can quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one with my shield of faith. Eph 6:16

There are so many more things God says we are. I chose these 4 words because most of us do not feel this way at all. Even on a good day, I struggle with believing what God says about me. I don’t doubt God; it is me who has a hard time believing any one feels that way about me. But God said it in His Word that we are each of these things.

My friends, let this soak into your soul. You ARE chosen by the Almighty God because He loves you. He made you ON PURPOSE. He FORGIVES you of all your sins if you ask Him to. He has also made you a FEARLESS WARRIOR.

Another very important reason you matter because we have a purpose. Even though we have a diagnosis of a mental disorder or a lable of some kind, Romans 8:28 (NASB) says, “And we know God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”

He will work things out for good. I believe with my whole heart that the things we go through are to help others when they go through them. We have felt alone at times, ashamed, or embarrassed but there is someone out there who feels the same way and needs help just like we did and do. That’s our purpose. That’s how we make a difference.

2 Corinthians 1:4 (The Message) says “He comes along side us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us along side someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us.

That verse also says YOU MATTER. He has given us a purpose. Let’s use all the tools, ideas, and help others and God has given us to help someone else.

Winter is a bummer for me. I dislike the cold, snow, gray shortened days.

But most of all I hate sliding into my winter depressive cycle. For years the darkness of bi-polar depression struck with fury, from November through February.

This year my depression has been mild. I even enjoyed Thanksgiving and Christmas for the first time in many years. A slight adjustment in my medication, exercise, reduced stress, and meditation helped level my mood.

But over the last few weeks I have noticed “early warning signs” of a dip in my mood. Here were some of my “early warning signs”.

First, I realized I was blankly staring into space. My mind was empty. I have been doing that recently with increasing frequency. From past experience this is one of my behaviors of the onset of depressive episode.

Another sign I have noticed is that I “sigh” more than usual, as though I don’t have the energy to get up from a chair. It was irritating my wife, who thought the sighs were because I didn’t want to help her. We talked about it and realized is one of my behavioral signs of my mood dropping.

I have had a persistent sadness over the last week, without reason. This slight dip in mood is like a “check engine” light on my car. It is time find out what is going on.

Prayer and Bible reading are not giving me satisfaction or enjoyment. This is unusual and is another sign to check.

Brain fog has settled in on occasion. I have had some times of troubling confusion. 

I have learned over the years these are all precursors to a depressive episode. 

What to do? I have had an uptick in my medicines that is a mood stabilizer. I purchased and used a sunlamp for light therapy. 

My psychiatrist recently retired and so I am searching for someone to do med checks. I have visited with a counselor who has screened me for a new psychiatrist. 

I have begun listening to gospel music which positively impacts my mood and spirit.

Why share my story? For two important reasons. First, we need to be able to recognize our unique that are precursors to a mood change. And then we need to have a plan in place to manage any relapse.

Relapse is an ugly word. But it does happen.

But there is one greater than our circumstances.

“Therefore, we will not fear though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, and the mountains quake with their surging.” (Psalms 46:2)

The psalmist describes his world falling apart. All that has provided stability for him is gone. The mountains and seas, his very foundation is disappearing.  

There is a reality beyond what we see.  Depression shrinks our world.  It turns us inward isolating us from others. Peace of mind shatters.  Our thinking processes are confused.  And convinces us that lies are truth, and truth are lies. Our world becomes a lonely place.

But the psalmist chooses to Look up!

David worships.  In his state of depression he worships when it seems impossible.  

It doesn’t matter how shattered his world, David places his confidence in God the Creator, of heaven and earth, and who will create all things new.

He has faith greater than his circumstances.

David has a place to go when his world has lost its moorings. God is his shelter and refuge.

Look up!

I first shared about my struggle with anxiety on my blog.

Before I knew it my post had been shared to thousands of people. Not because my words were special or that my story was different. No, my story resonated with all the people suffering in silence thinking, you too?

A friend from Lutheran Hour Ministries reached out to me to see if I would be interested in doing an interview about how my faith has helped me through my struggle.

That meant leaving my two year old, to get on a plane and travel with my five month old.  That meant meeting a roomful of people I didn’t know and sharing with them my most intimate struggles in front of a camera.

I took a deep breath and said yes. Not because I was unafraid, not even because I felt courageous, but because I knew that God went before me, that he was with me, and that if I showed up, He would be there too.

That morning as I was getting ready, I saw a big framed picture of a dandelion in the bathroom hotel. I’ve always said that dandelions were my favorite flower, because of their imperfect beauty. Dandelions break apart to plant new seeds. I pray that God would use my brokenness to plant hope in hurting hearts.

Standing outside the door of the interview room, I opened my devotion and read this verse,

“See, God has come to save me. I will trust in him and not be afraid. The LORD God is my strength and my song; he has given me victory.” Isaiah 12:2

Friends, can we stand in the doorway of uncertainty, feeling afraid and shaking, and still walk through knowing God will meet us there? I hope this video reminds you that you are not in this struggle alone- you have a community- but most of all, that God has come to save you. He came to save you as a helpless infant. He came to save you on a cross. He came out of the grave to save you. God comes to save you in the small moments when you pray, “God help me,” and He is there, so you are never alone.