By Chris Morris

About four years after I graduated from college, I began to feel the familiar tug of depressive episodes once again. It always started the same, with an internal question like this: Just who do you think you are doing all these things? Do you really think you’re qualified to be a husband, father, and church leader? You’re a mess, and you need to stop everything now. Of course, I didn’t even know what stopping everything would mean, but the questions weren’t intended to be taken literally. No, they were intended to instill doubt and uncertainty in me, and they accomplished their goal. You see, I didn’t have enough understanding of how trauma or spiritual warfare work to see that these thoughts weren’t necessarily my own, but that they could be the voices of the enemy or of those who had hurt me in the past. Instead, I just accepted these thoughts as mine and began to feel overwhelmed.

Things came to a head eventually. I don’t remember the specific event, but I finally agreed with my wife. Something had to change. I scheduled an appointment to speak with my pastor. In retrospect, I wish I would have gone somewhere else instead. I am glad I listened to my wife and talked to someone, but my pastor wasn’t equipped to help me in a meaningful way.

I shared with my pastor the struggles that I had with depression. I explained that I largely maintained a false sense of togetherness when running church events, while at home I somewhat regularly blew up at my wife and son or sloughed off into the bedroom to be by myself instead of investing in my family. I shared that I read my Bible and prayed, but it didn’t seem to be doing much. I told him that I had been suicidal before I became a Christian and hadn’t struggled with it since, but I had started to worry it might make another appearance because I started fielding some of those same worthless thought patterns from my suicidal teen days. He listened to me ramble for about ten minutes, and then he spoke five words I will never forget: “Man up and pray more.”

That’s all he said basically, to man up and pray more. He explained that Christian men find themselves at the forefront of the spiritual battlefield because God holds us responsible for ourselves and our families. If anything bad happens to anyone in our family, it’s our fault because God calls us to be the spiritual head of the family. He told me I had failed in my responsibilities at home, and that the devil took advantage of me because of my weakness. If I gave any space to those intrusive thoughts, I sinned and opened the door for the enemy to wreck my family because of my own personal sin. The only answer to this dilemma remained taking up my calling as a biblical man, standing strong in the power that Jesus gives all Christian men, and praying more. He told me that if I just prayed more my depressive thoughts would have no choice but to dissipate because they come from the devil and God is stronger than the devil.

Nothing redeeming took place in the immediate aftermath of this vignette in my life. All my worst fears came to fruition when I talked to my pastor about my mental health struggles, so I learned to keep it all to myself moving forward. Too many churches and church leaders have an oversimplified view of mental health and faith, rather than recognizing the nuanced reality that mature people can be (for example) depressed without their depression calling into question their faith. This theological construct has damaged so many people, and (some) churches are just now starting to come out of this pattern of belief. Too many people have been damaged by well-meaning pastors espousing so-called “biblical counseling” who share similar advice to my previous pastor’s words. These pastors hurt their flock because they don’t understand the full message of the gospel about mental health. Mental health does not equal spiritual maturity, and spiritual maturity does not guarantee mental health.

(This is an excerpt from the new book Resilient and Redeemed: Lessons About Suicidality and Depression from the Psych Ward).

Chris Morris is a certified mental health coach dedicated to promoting understanding of mental health issues within the church. Because of a lifelong struggle with depression and suicidality, Chris became committed to breaking down the stigma surrounding mental health and encouraging others to seek after holistic health.

As a writer and speaker, Chris has shared his personal story and insights with audiences across the country, inspiring many individuals to take control of their own health, break free from poor theological teaching placed upon them, and seek the support they need. He has published several books on mental health, the most recent being Resilient and Redeemed.

by Mike Jacquart

I retired as the editor of a magazine for employee assistance professionals several years ago, but I never gave a thought to writing about this topic – until now. I am finally doing so for two reasons: 

1) More and more Boomers like myself are retiring (full time at least) from the workforce each and every year. 2) Retirement is an overlooked cause of depression, especially for men since we are hard-wired to be breadwinners. And yet, recent retirees with few outside hobbies or interests are more prone to suffering a mental health impairment.

I recently spoke with a friend of mine in his sixties who has worked as district manager for a convenience store chain for many years. “What should I do, Jake?” he asked. (Jake is my nickname). Working full time for 50 hours or more a week left him little time for anything other than work and driving to his cottage to relax on weekends. (Working long hours is true for many of us, and not just men).

One suggestion I gave him was to get involved in volunteering in some fashion. I mentioned the Lions organization as one possibility, as I have been an active member of a local club for twenty years. I have also enjoyed bringing the gospel of Jesus to inmates in a local jail for about the same number of years. Both activities provided a much-needed transition into retirement as they gave me built-in things to do outside the home. I was VERY blessed to have some work-life balance since I could usually complete my tasks as a full-time editor in 32-35 hours a week.

Exercise offers another, healthy bridge from one phase of life to the next. And while you’d never know it from my weight (grin), I like walking my dog each day and riding a stationary bike at a local fitness center.

Volunteering and exercise, of course, are but a few ideas. Maybe working out isn’t your bag, or perhaps you already exercise. Or joining a civic organization might not be of interest either. 

You may also wish to keep working past 65. This has become increasingly common for Boomers – either for financial reasons, or you simply want to keep working because you like your job and are in good health. 

Stressed out after many years of being a slave to a calendar and endless deadlines, I knew that retiring would reduce my anxiety and be good for my mental health.  MOST important though, is to ask God what you should do FIRST, and not AFTER  you are stuck in a boring or otherwise unhappy retirement! 

Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart. And lean not on your understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and He shall direct your paths.”

I know firsthand from a number of failed jobs and ventures that leaning on the Lord’s wisdom, and not my ideas, works out a LOT better. Good luck, and happy retirement.

Mike Jacquart belongs to a Fresh Hope support group and the author of “Climbing out of Darkness: A Personal Journey into Mental Wellness.” He enjoys sharing his story of “pushing through” on blog posts, podcasts, and other presentations. For more information, contact him at madjac@tds.net.

Sent from Mail for Windows

By Pastor Brad Hoefs

Introduction

Let me share a true story about Jamie. Jamie had faced the battle of a lifetime with a brain tumor. She had received all kinds of support: medical care, family visits, meals from friends, and prayers from her church community. A year later, however, Jamie found herself in a different kind of battle—she was hospitalized for severe depression. This time, there were no visits, no meals, and not even a single call from her church community. Jamie’s story illustrates a significant gap in how faith communities address mental health issues. It’s time we re-evaluate our stance and recognize the pivotal role churches can play in mental health recovery.

The Historical Role of Churches and Mental Health

For the past 40 years, many churches have maintained that mental health issues should be left to mental health professionals. With few exceptions, the conversation around mental health has been noticeably absent from the pulpit. Pastoral care often extends to offering referrals to mental health experts but rarely goes beyond that and while referrals are very much needed, faith communities have a pivotal role to play still.

The Current State of Mental Health

We’re currently facing a global crisis rife with hopelessness, despair, and mental health issues. The demand for mental health professionals far outpaces the supply. Access to and affordability of mental health care remains problematic. Yet, research by Lifeway reveals that more people first approach their faith leaders rather than doctors, counselors, or psychiatrists combined. This makes faith leaders frontline responders in this crisis of hopelessness. It’s time for faith communities to wake up to their vital role in this fight.

The mental health landscape globally is alarming. Rates of anxiety, depression, and other mental health disorders have skyrocketed, exacerbated by ongoing global crises. The issue transcends borders, affecting individuals from all walks of life. The role of churches in providing support has never been more crucial.

Yet, the role of churches and faith communities in offering hope and support to those struggling with mental health issues is often overlooked. Research consistently shows that peer support can be as effective, if not more so, than individual counseling. Faith communities have a unique opportunity to step into the gap between professional mental health appointments and everyday living.

Successful Initiatives by Faith Communities

There are inspiring examples of faith communities making a tangible difference in mental well-being. For instance, some churches have started mental health support groups, providing peer-to-peer support that empowers individuals to live well despite their mental health struggles. Alcoholics Anonymous is a prime example of a faith-based support group effectively helping individuals find their way forward. Similarly, mental health support groups within the church can be transformative.

As a pastor for nearly 40 years and someone who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 1995, I have firsthand experience with the power of faith-based support. After starting the first Fresh Hope group over 16 years ago, I’ve witnessed countless lives transformed through participation in faith-based, hope-directed support groups. This is where the church can truly make a difference.

The Challenges Ahead

Despite the potential, many churches face challenges in embracing this role. The stigma surrounding mental health can be a significant barrier, as can a lack of understanding and resources within the church community. Additionally, there is often uncertainty about how to integrate mental health support into existing church activities without overstepping boundaries in the domain of mental health professionals.

Faith Communities are Essential

Hope is a crucial component of mental health recovery. Research has shown that when hope is infused with faith, it becomes solid and certain. Faith communities are the experts in offering hope, yet many shy away from addressing mental health issues directly. While it can be intimidating to step into new territories, faith communities offer a different kind of hope that is anchored beyond our present circumstances.

The statistics are sobering: more people die by suicide annually than by homicide or car accidents. How many more need to suffer or die before churches take more substantial action than merely offering referrals?

Conclusion

Faith communities have a unique, pivotal role to play in combating hopelessness. Churches have remarkable potential as powerful agents of change in mental health recovery. Practical steps can include starting mental health support groups, offering ongoing pastoral care, and breaking down the stigma surrounding mental health within the congregation.

We must ask ourselves: how many more lives need to be lost before we act?  The time for faith communities to step into their rightful role is now. Encourage your church to take action, share this message, and be part of the solution.

Together, we can offer hope where it’s needed most.

For more information about Fresh Hope, please click here or feel free to email us at info@freshhope.us

By Mark Soppitt

In 2008, my struggle with depression began and lasted for seven challenging years. During this period, I was diagnosed with a number of mental health conditions, and between 2012-2014  I spent a number of times as an inpatient, either on a psychiatric ward or at a healthcare facility specializing in mental health treatment. Despite the care I received, those years were often desperately difficult and disorienting for me and my family. 

Moving to Niagara Falls from the UK  in 2005 with my wife and five young children brought unforeseen challenges. Adjusting to our new Canadian culture was more different than we bargained for. Simple tasks like driving on the opposite side of the road, or shopping, and the harder aspects of facing our first long, cold winter proved more difficult than expected. Whilst we moved to Canada in response to the clear call of God we felt, it also brought with it financial strains and unexpected changes even within our marriage.

Financial issues within the church added pressure to my role as a pastor and the difference in costs between currencies and unexpected expenses strained our personal finances. The church was left with building debts incurred from its heyday some years previously, and hardships faced by members, increased our challenges.

Personal finances were tight, and financial support from the church wasn’t always sufficient. We often faced difficulty affording basic necessities, relying on the kindness of others for groceries and Christmas gifts for our children. Yet, despite hardships, we found moments of grace and kindness within our new community, as we made new friends and settled in.

In sharing these struggles, they reflect the pressures faced by our family as newcomers. Adapting to a new country, a different culture, and facing financial insecurities added to the uncertainties we felt. These challenges, along with the responsibility of helping a struggling church community heal, contributed to my eventual illness. 

In hindsight, reflecting on my journey battling depression reveals profound insights that could have better prepared me for the challenges ahead.I hope that in sharing them, others will be encouraged to prepare and grow and be confident in the grace of God. 

Faith and Emotional Health Go Together To Produce a Resilient Life

I came to understand that faith, optimism, and a positive outlook, though valuable, are not substitutes for emotional wellness when life’s storms hit. Hidden beneath my exterior lay deep childhood wounds I had long forgotten about, not realising the lasting impact they had on my emotional state. Neglecting these unresolved emotions allowed them to fester without going away. When life pressures became too overwhelming, there was a volcano of hidden pain ready to explode. They eventually erupted with a force that caused turmoil within me and pain and misunderstanding to those around me. 

I now recognise the power of addressing these inner wounds to prevent them from derailing one’s spiritual and emotional well-being. One of the difficulties I faced was that I had always been fairly diligent in dealing with my internal world of thoughts and emotions. However, the accumulation of pressures and stress in these years was more consistent and persistent than sudden and traumatic. Their effect on me went largely unnoticed until suddenly I could not cope any more and I was unable to do any meaningful healing work in my life for many years.

Your Partner is Not Your Rock – God is

Additionally, I learned that no amount of love from a partner can shield us from the unexpected pressures of life. In my dependence on my wife to bring order to my chaotic world, I failed to acknowledge her struggles and the boundaries necessary for a healthy relationship. Years later, we would see that my illness served as a catalyst for untangling our codependency, leading us to develop greater honesty, less fear, and more constructive growth. Where before we were often ruled by the emotional state of the other, we learnt to keep our focus fixed on God first. This newfound clarity highlighted the importance of understanding how past experiences can impact current relationships and the necessity of building them based on mutual growth rather than dependency.

Preparation Saves Much Trouble

Furthermore, preparing for the unknown proved to be a crucial lesson from my journey. No amount of preparation can predict every eventuality life throws our way; therefore, cultivating resilient faith and being surrounded by supportive people becomes crucial. Alongside this, I discovered that there is wisdom in asking more probing questions about where God is sending you before you go. I blindly believed that if God spoke it would all work out fine and so I didn’t look too closely at where and what we were going to. Sometimes it doesn’t go well, or dreams fall apart through no fault of our own. Better preparation can help to reduce or even eliminate the forces that seek to “kill, rob, and destroy” (John 10:10) the call of God on our lives.

God is Still Sovereign in The Darkness

For reasons only God knows, sometimes things don’t turn out well. Yet, even when things fail or go wrong in our own eyes (or even the eyes of others around us), He is still working and He is still ruling on His throne. It took me a long time to get up off the floor of my disappointment and begin to trust God again. In time I began to listen to His kind voice and worship once more, and I am richer for the experience. As someone once said to me, I got a million dollars worth of experience that I wouldn’t pay 5 cents to get! God can use these deep experiences to help others and further His kingdom. Church history is full of examples of this, and He can use your story too.

Weakness is a Given – Acknowledging it is a Choice

As life’s storms battered me, I realised they were revealing my vulnerabilities and limitations, exposing areas of weakness and avenues for personal growth. Admitting my weaknesses and acknowledging my dependency on God to supportive friends during these times was a key towards my growth and transformation. Embracing challenges as opportunities for maturity rather than destruction enabled me to face crises with honesty, humility, and trust in God’s sovereign plan. My mindset had to change from “suffering is my enemy,” to “God is with me in my suffering and He is still working good.”

Hiding Does Not Lead to Growth

In the depths of my despair, where hope seemed lost, I withdrew into self-protection, yearning for escape from pain. It was during these dark moments that I found myself on the edge and in a very dangerous place. However, amidst the self-destructive spiral, a glimmer of light emerged as God intervened, revealing a renewal of hope and a pathway to healing. He was so at work in the provision of expert care and the kindness of our friends and community. Whilst this period of deep darkness unearthed the profound impact of trauma—past and present—on my well-being, God carefully led us into a story that speaks of His goodness still coming in the land of the living (Ps.27:13). 

God is Our Saviour and Redeemer

Through my tumultuous journey, despite witnessing some of the horrible effects of suffering, I also witnessed divine redemption. I came to realise God’s ability to breathe new life into the broken pieces of my existence, shaping my weaknesses into strength and resilience. Acknowledging the depths of my vulnerabilities enabled me to cultivate a deeper dependency on God, fostering a newfound sense of faith, hope, and perseverance in the face of adversity. It has taken some time for this to happen. It didn’t happen overnight, but rather step by step, day by day. 

If you feel hopelessly stuck in a dark place I hope these reflections will  help you to not give up. Everyday God is at work in this broken world, speaking forth life and bringing the atmosphere of the kingdom into the darkness. May He do this for you and those you love. For others, I hope these thoughts will encourage greater preparedness, resilience, healing, and an unwavering trust in God in the midst of life’s uncertainties and challenges. As Job declared in his suffering, ““But as for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, and he will stand upon the earth at last” (Job 19:25 NLT).

Mark lives in Niagara Falls, Canada with his wife, Janet. They have 5 children and a dog and enjoy exercise, public speaking, and motivating others. They have walked through many years of navigating mental illness and its effects on their marriage, their children, and pretty much every aspect of their lives. Through Living Well Coaching, their desire is to connect people to Jesus’ unlimited resources, and help them build resilient, healthy, and fruitful lives that glorify God and reach their full potential. You can follow them on social media: INSTAGRAM @livingwellcoaching; FACEBOOK livingwellcoachingniagara or their website Livingwellcoaching.ca