By Peggy Rice

I just returned home last night after a 5-day journey across the country. From Colorado to Wisconsin and back again, almost 2300 miles. I want to use that trip to draw some parallels to our journey from mental illness to mental health. This is for those who struggle with mental health challenges, but also applies to those who love someone in such a battle.

The Journey Can Feel Long

It took only 5 days to go and come home, but each day felt like it would never end! This can be true when we walk the journey of mental health – days drag on – day after day of fighting the depression or the anxiety or whatever the symptoms may be. It seems like there is no end in sight! Moments become minutes which become hours, which become days, weeks, months, sometimes years. For some people, mental health challenges may be a life-long journey – often 3 steps forward and 2 steps back. Will the end of the road ever come into view?

While it’s hard to think of waiting a lifetime for relief, for many, the experience is not life-long, but has a beginning and an end. Maybe it’s just one episode. Maybe it starts in the teen years, then comes back in mid-life. And we can know that the journey will eventually have an end. When we reach heaven, we will be completely healthy. No mental illness, no emotional struggles. Complete and whole.

“For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.” 2 Corinthians 4:17 NIV  Of course, mental health struggles don’t feel light and momentary. But when compared to an eternity with Christ, they are just a blip in time.

Don’t Go It Alone

This cross-country trip had me and my husband in the front seats. On my mental health journey, I had my husband, sister, best friend, church friends, therapist, psych doc, general doc, plus many old friends from where I had previously lived, who I reached out to via emails. I was not alone, though it sure felt like it at times! But the truth is, there were people who cared about me, who prayed for and with me, who encouraged me.

I highly encourage you to find someone, or some people, who can walk your mental health journey with you. Find a safe person – someone who is willing to walk the long journey. A pastor, or Bible Study teacher, or girlfriend, or family member. Certainly a therapist and psych doc. Fresh Hope (freshhope.us) has online support groups, if you can’t find anyone in your area.

Take Breaks

It was important on our car trip that we stopped to go the bathroom and stretch our legs. Every couple of hours! We need to do the same thing as we journey with mental health struggles. Build in some time and space to think about something other than your mental health challenge. Volunteer someplace, go to the library, walk around a pond, stretch before getting into bed – anything to break the normal routine.

Be Kind To Yourself

On our trip, our mornings started pretty early, but I am not a morning person, so I often took a nap or two along the way. We drank water, and ate snacks (both healthy and a little junk food).  Same for the mental health journey: take naps, eat healthy, stay hydrated, allow yourself a treat (Is it chocolate? Ice cream? – just a little!).

Medicine Can Help

A couple of times, I took a pain reliever before I went to bed – my body was sore from being cramped in the car for so many hours, and I had kinks that stretching didn’t relieve. Often in mental health struggles, a prescription from your general or psych doc might be helpful to get your brain working right again, to get those neurons firing the way they’re supposed to. Medicine doesn’t fix it all, but I found that it lifted me up enough from the depths of despair to allow me to begin to think clearly, and to have the ability to work on my thoughts and stop the ruminating.

 There May Be Moments of Joy – Celebrate Them!

One night, we stopped at my parents’ house for a few hours, and got to visit and eat dinner together. Another night, we were with my sister-in-law. And another with my daughter and son-in-law. There was laughter, and relaxing together. This interruption to the journey can happen in mental health, too. Not all days, not all moments, are down and dark, or full of anxiety. Even if it’s just a brief reprieve, allow yourself to enjoy it. While you may not celebrate it like you would without a mental health challenge, even a little celebration of the change in routine is healthy. And in fact, as you heal, there will be more of those moments and less of the hard ones!

Certainly, the journey we walk from mental illness to mental health is not easy. But we do not walk it alone. Jesus is with us every step of the way. And there are things we can do that will aid in our healing, and make the journey bearable, even productive.

At the end of your journey, you will have a story to tell. Of God’s faithfulness to you as you walked along toward mental health.

Peggy has been involved with Fresh Hope as a Group Facilitator for 5 years and as the Hope Coach trainer for 3. You can reach her at peggy@freshhope.us

By Chris Morris

About four years after I graduated from college, I began to feel the familiar tug of depressive episodes once again. It always started the same, with an internal question like this: Just who do you think you are doing all these things? Do you really think you’re qualified to be a husband, father, and church leader? You’re a mess, and you need to stop everything now. Of course, I didn’t even know what stopping everything would mean, but the questions weren’t intended to be taken literally. No, they were intended to instill doubt and uncertainty in me, and they accomplished their goal. You see, I didn’t have enough understanding of how trauma or spiritual warfare work to see that these thoughts weren’t necessarily my own, but that they could be the voices of the enemy or of those who had hurt me in the past. Instead, I just accepted these thoughts as mine and began to feel overwhelmed.

Things came to a head eventually. I don’t remember the specific event, but I finally agreed with my wife. Something had to change. I scheduled an appointment to speak with my pastor. In retrospect, I wish I would have gone somewhere else instead. I am glad I listened to my wife and talked to someone, but my pastor wasn’t equipped to help me in a meaningful way.

I shared with my pastor the struggles that I had with depression. I explained that I largely maintained a false sense of togetherness when running church events, while at home I somewhat regularly blew up at my wife and son or sloughed off into the bedroom to be by myself instead of investing in my family. I shared that I read my Bible and prayed, but it didn’t seem to be doing much. I told him that I had been suicidal before I became a Christian and hadn’t struggled with it since, but I had started to worry it might make another appearance because I started fielding some of those same worthless thought patterns from my suicidal teen days. He listened to me ramble for about ten minutes, and then he spoke five words I will never forget: “Man up and pray more.”

That’s all he said basically, to man up and pray more. He explained that Christian men find themselves at the forefront of the spiritual battlefield because God holds us responsible for ourselves and our families. If anything bad happens to anyone in our family, it’s our fault because God calls us to be the spiritual head of the family. He told me I had failed in my responsibilities at home, and that the devil took advantage of me because of my weakness. If I gave any space to those intrusive thoughts, I sinned and opened the door for the enemy to wreck my family because of my own personal sin. The only answer to this dilemma remained taking up my calling as a biblical man, standing strong in the power that Jesus gives all Christian men, and praying more. He told me that if I just prayed more my depressive thoughts would have no choice but to dissipate because they come from the devil and God is stronger than the devil.

Nothing redeeming took place in the immediate aftermath of this vignette in my life. All my worst fears came to fruition when I talked to my pastor about my mental health struggles, so I learned to keep it all to myself moving forward. Too many churches and church leaders have an oversimplified view of mental health and faith, rather than recognizing the nuanced reality that mature people can be (for example) depressed without their depression calling into question their faith. This theological construct has damaged so many people, and (some) churches are just now starting to come out of this pattern of belief. Too many people have been damaged by well-meaning pastors espousing so-called “biblical counseling” who share similar advice to my previous pastor’s words. These pastors hurt their flock because they don’t understand the full message of the gospel about mental health. Mental health does not equal spiritual maturity, and spiritual maturity does not guarantee mental health.

(This is an excerpt from the new book Resilient and Redeemed: Lessons About Suicidality and Depression from the Psych Ward).

Chris Morris is a certified mental health coach dedicated to promoting understanding of mental health issues within the church. Because of a lifelong struggle with depression and suicidality, Chris became committed to breaking down the stigma surrounding mental health and encouraging others to seek after holistic health.

As a writer and speaker, Chris has shared his personal story and insights with audiences across the country, inspiring many individuals to take control of their own health, break free from poor theological teaching placed upon them, and seek the support they need. He has published several books on mental health, the most recent being Resilient and Redeemed.

by Mike Jacquart

I retired as the editor of a magazine for employee assistance professionals several years ago, but I never gave a thought to writing about this topic – until now. I am finally doing so for two reasons: 

1) More and more Boomers like myself are retiring (full time at least) from the workforce each and every year. 2) Retirement is an overlooked cause of depression, especially for men since we are hard-wired to be breadwinners. And yet, recent retirees with few outside hobbies or interests are more prone to suffering a mental health impairment.

I recently spoke with a friend of mine in his sixties who has worked as district manager for a convenience store chain for many years. “What should I do, Jake?” he asked. (Jake is my nickname). Working full time for 50 hours or more a week left him little time for anything other than work and driving to his cottage to relax on weekends. (Working long hours is true for many of us, and not just men).

One suggestion I gave him was to get involved in volunteering in some fashion. I mentioned the Lions organization as one possibility, as I have been an active member of a local club for twenty years. I have also enjoyed bringing the gospel of Jesus to inmates in a local jail for about the same number of years. Both activities provided a much-needed transition into retirement as they gave me built-in things to do outside the home. I was VERY blessed to have some work-life balance since I could usually complete my tasks as a full-time editor in 32-35 hours a week.

Exercise offers another, healthy bridge from one phase of life to the next. And while you’d never know it from my weight (grin), I like walking my dog each day and riding a stationary bike at a local fitness center.

Volunteering and exercise, of course, are but a few ideas. Maybe working out isn’t your bag, or perhaps you already exercise. Or joining a civic organization might not be of interest either. 

You may also wish to keep working past 65. This has become increasingly common for Boomers – either for financial reasons, or you simply want to keep working because you like your job and are in good health. 

Stressed out after many years of being a slave to a calendar and endless deadlines, I knew that retiring would reduce my anxiety and be good for my mental health.  MOST important though, is to ask God what you should do FIRST, and not AFTER  you are stuck in a boring or otherwise unhappy retirement! 

Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart. And lean not on your understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and He shall direct your paths.”

I know firsthand from a number of failed jobs and ventures that leaning on the Lord’s wisdom, and not my ideas, works out a LOT better. Good luck, and happy retirement.

Mike Jacquart belongs to a Fresh Hope support group and the author of “Climbing out of Darkness: A Personal Journey into Mental Wellness.” He enjoys sharing his story of “pushing through” on blog posts, podcasts, and other presentations. For more information, contact him at madjac@tds.net.

Sent from Mail for Windows

By Pastor Brad Hoefs

Introduction

Let me share a true story about Jamie. Jamie had faced the battle of a lifetime with a brain tumor. She had received all kinds of support: medical care, family visits, meals from friends, and prayers from her church community. A year later, however, Jamie found herself in a different kind of battle—she was hospitalized for severe depression. This time, there were no visits, no meals, and not even a single call from her church community. Jamie’s story illustrates a significant gap in how faith communities address mental health issues. It’s time we re-evaluate our stance and recognize the pivotal role churches can play in mental health recovery.

The Historical Role of Churches and Mental Health

For the past 40 years, many churches have maintained that mental health issues should be left to mental health professionals. With few exceptions, the conversation around mental health has been noticeably absent from the pulpit. Pastoral care often extends to offering referrals to mental health experts but rarely goes beyond that and while referrals are very much needed, faith communities have a pivotal role to play still.

The Current State of Mental Health

We’re currently facing a global crisis rife with hopelessness, despair, and mental health issues. The demand for mental health professionals far outpaces the supply. Access to and affordability of mental health care remains problematic. Yet, research by Lifeway reveals that more people first approach their faith leaders rather than doctors, counselors, or psychiatrists combined. This makes faith leaders frontline responders in this crisis of hopelessness. It’s time for faith communities to wake up to their vital role in this fight.

The mental health landscape globally is alarming. Rates of anxiety, depression, and other mental health disorders have skyrocketed, exacerbated by ongoing global crises. The issue transcends borders, affecting individuals from all walks of life. The role of churches in providing support has never been more crucial.

Yet, the role of churches and faith communities in offering hope and support to those struggling with mental health issues is often overlooked. Research consistently shows that peer support can be as effective, if not more so, than individual counseling. Faith communities have a unique opportunity to step into the gap between professional mental health appointments and everyday living.

Successful Initiatives by Faith Communities

There are inspiring examples of faith communities making a tangible difference in mental well-being. For instance, some churches have started mental health support groups, providing peer-to-peer support that empowers individuals to live well despite their mental health struggles. Alcoholics Anonymous is a prime example of a faith-based support group effectively helping individuals find their way forward. Similarly, mental health support groups within the church can be transformative.

As a pastor for nearly 40 years and someone who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 1995, I have firsthand experience with the power of faith-based support. After starting the first Fresh Hope group over 16 years ago, I’ve witnessed countless lives transformed through participation in faith-based, hope-directed support groups. This is where the church can truly make a difference.

The Challenges Ahead

Despite the potential, many churches face challenges in embracing this role. The stigma surrounding mental health can be a significant barrier, as can a lack of understanding and resources within the church community. Additionally, there is often uncertainty about how to integrate mental health support into existing church activities without overstepping boundaries in the domain of mental health professionals.

Faith Communities are Essential

Hope is a crucial component of mental health recovery. Research has shown that when hope is infused with faith, it becomes solid and certain. Faith communities are the experts in offering hope, yet many shy away from addressing mental health issues directly. While it can be intimidating to step into new territories, faith communities offer a different kind of hope that is anchored beyond our present circumstances.

The statistics are sobering: more people die by suicide annually than by homicide or car accidents. How many more need to suffer or die before churches take more substantial action than merely offering referrals?

Conclusion

Faith communities have a unique, pivotal role to play in combating hopelessness. Churches have remarkable potential as powerful agents of change in mental health recovery. Practical steps can include starting mental health support groups, offering ongoing pastoral care, and breaking down the stigma surrounding mental health within the congregation.

We must ask ourselves: how many more lives need to be lost before we act?  The time for faith communities to step into their rightful role is now. Encourage your church to take action, share this message, and be part of the solution.

Together, we can offer hope where it’s needed most.

For more information about Fresh Hope, please click here or feel free to email us at info@freshhope.us

By Mark Soppitt

In 2008, my struggle with depression began and lasted for seven challenging years. During this period, I was diagnosed with a number of mental health conditions, and between 2012-2014  I spent a number of times as an inpatient, either on a psychiatric ward or at a healthcare facility specializing in mental health treatment. Despite the care I received, those years were often desperately difficult and disorienting for me and my family. 

Moving to Niagara Falls from the UK  in 2005 with my wife and five young children brought unforeseen challenges. Adjusting to our new Canadian culture was more different than we bargained for. Simple tasks like driving on the opposite side of the road, or shopping, and the harder aspects of facing our first long, cold winter proved more difficult than expected. Whilst we moved to Canada in response to the clear call of God we felt, it also brought with it financial strains and unexpected changes even within our marriage.

Financial issues within the church added pressure to my role as a pastor and the difference in costs between currencies and unexpected expenses strained our personal finances. The church was left with building debts incurred from its heyday some years previously, and hardships faced by members, increased our challenges.

Personal finances were tight, and financial support from the church wasn’t always sufficient. We often faced difficulty affording basic necessities, relying on the kindness of others for groceries and Christmas gifts for our children. Yet, despite hardships, we found moments of grace and kindness within our new community, as we made new friends and settled in.

In sharing these struggles, they reflect the pressures faced by our family as newcomers. Adapting to a new country, a different culture, and facing financial insecurities added to the uncertainties we felt. These challenges, along with the responsibility of helping a struggling church community heal, contributed to my eventual illness. 

In hindsight, reflecting on my journey battling depression reveals profound insights that could have better prepared me for the challenges ahead.I hope that in sharing them, others will be encouraged to prepare and grow and be confident in the grace of God. 

Faith and Emotional Health Go Together To Produce a Resilient Life

I came to understand that faith, optimism, and a positive outlook, though valuable, are not substitutes for emotional wellness when life’s storms hit. Hidden beneath my exterior lay deep childhood wounds I had long forgotten about, not realising the lasting impact they had on my emotional state. Neglecting these unresolved emotions allowed them to fester without going away. When life pressures became too overwhelming, there was a volcano of hidden pain ready to explode. They eventually erupted with a force that caused turmoil within me and pain and misunderstanding to those around me. 

I now recognise the power of addressing these inner wounds to prevent them from derailing one’s spiritual and emotional well-being. One of the difficulties I faced was that I had always been fairly diligent in dealing with my internal world of thoughts and emotions. However, the accumulation of pressures and stress in these years was more consistent and persistent than sudden and traumatic. Their effect on me went largely unnoticed until suddenly I could not cope any more and I was unable to do any meaningful healing work in my life for many years.

Your Partner is Not Your Rock – God is

Additionally, I learned that no amount of love from a partner can shield us from the unexpected pressures of life. In my dependence on my wife to bring order to my chaotic world, I failed to acknowledge her struggles and the boundaries necessary for a healthy relationship. Years later, we would see that my illness served as a catalyst for untangling our codependency, leading us to develop greater honesty, less fear, and more constructive growth. Where before we were often ruled by the emotional state of the other, we learnt to keep our focus fixed on God first. This newfound clarity highlighted the importance of understanding how past experiences can impact current relationships and the necessity of building them based on mutual growth rather than dependency.

Preparation Saves Much Trouble

Furthermore, preparing for the unknown proved to be a crucial lesson from my journey. No amount of preparation can predict every eventuality life throws our way; therefore, cultivating resilient faith and being surrounded by supportive people becomes crucial. Alongside this, I discovered that there is wisdom in asking more probing questions about where God is sending you before you go. I blindly believed that if God spoke it would all work out fine and so I didn’t look too closely at where and what we were going to. Sometimes it doesn’t go well, or dreams fall apart through no fault of our own. Better preparation can help to reduce or even eliminate the forces that seek to “kill, rob, and destroy” (John 10:10) the call of God on our lives.

God is Still Sovereign in The Darkness

For reasons only God knows, sometimes things don’t turn out well. Yet, even when things fail or go wrong in our own eyes (or even the eyes of others around us), He is still working and He is still ruling on His throne. It took me a long time to get up off the floor of my disappointment and begin to trust God again. In time I began to listen to His kind voice and worship once more, and I am richer for the experience. As someone once said to me, I got a million dollars worth of experience that I wouldn’t pay 5 cents to get! God can use these deep experiences to help others and further His kingdom. Church history is full of examples of this, and He can use your story too.

Weakness is a Given – Acknowledging it is a Choice

As life’s storms battered me, I realised they were revealing my vulnerabilities and limitations, exposing areas of weakness and avenues for personal growth. Admitting my weaknesses and acknowledging my dependency on God to supportive friends during these times was a key towards my growth and transformation. Embracing challenges as opportunities for maturity rather than destruction enabled me to face crises with honesty, humility, and trust in God’s sovereign plan. My mindset had to change from “suffering is my enemy,” to “God is with me in my suffering and He is still working good.”

Hiding Does Not Lead to Growth

In the depths of my despair, where hope seemed lost, I withdrew into self-protection, yearning for escape from pain. It was during these dark moments that I found myself on the edge and in a very dangerous place. However, amidst the self-destructive spiral, a glimmer of light emerged as God intervened, revealing a renewal of hope and a pathway to healing. He was so at work in the provision of expert care and the kindness of our friends and community. Whilst this period of deep darkness unearthed the profound impact of trauma—past and present—on my well-being, God carefully led us into a story that speaks of His goodness still coming in the land of the living (Ps.27:13). 

God is Our Saviour and Redeemer

Through my tumultuous journey, despite witnessing some of the horrible effects of suffering, I also witnessed divine redemption. I came to realise God’s ability to breathe new life into the broken pieces of my existence, shaping my weaknesses into strength and resilience. Acknowledging the depths of my vulnerabilities enabled me to cultivate a deeper dependency on God, fostering a newfound sense of faith, hope, and perseverance in the face of adversity. It has taken some time for this to happen. It didn’t happen overnight, but rather step by step, day by day. 

If you feel hopelessly stuck in a dark place I hope these reflections will  help you to not give up. Everyday God is at work in this broken world, speaking forth life and bringing the atmosphere of the kingdom into the darkness. May He do this for you and those you love. For others, I hope these thoughts will encourage greater preparedness, resilience, healing, and an unwavering trust in God in the midst of life’s uncertainties and challenges. As Job declared in his suffering, ““But as for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, and he will stand upon the earth at last” (Job 19:25 NLT).

Mark lives in Niagara Falls, Canada with his wife, Janet. They have 5 children and a dog and enjoy exercise, public speaking, and motivating others. They have walked through many years of navigating mental illness and its effects on their marriage, their children, and pretty much every aspect of their lives. Through Living Well Coaching, their desire is to connect people to Jesus’ unlimited resources, and help them build resilient, healthy, and fruitful lives that glorify God and reach their full potential. You can follow them on social media: INSTAGRAM @livingwellcoaching; FACEBOOK livingwellcoachingniagara or their website Livingwellcoaching.ca

By Peggy Rice

My heart is heavy. I’m not crying, not right now, but I can feel the weight in my chest. I’m burdened. I’m sad.

I just returned yesterday from a funeral for a family member, someone I loved very much. He loved the Lord, and so there was certainly a celebration of life – the one he lived here on earth, and the one he is experiencing now with his Savior in heaven. And I know that, as a believer, I do not grieve as one with no hope (see I Thessalonians 4:13). We have the assurance that he is with Jesus.

But that does not change the fact that there still is grief. For his wife, his mother, his children, his siblings. For the many lives he touched with kindness and gentleness and his smile and his laugh and his sense of humor. For all of those he left behind. Including me.

So, I will cry out to God. I will write a lament, expressing myself to the One who can comfort me.

David did it – the Psalms are full of David pouring out his feelings to God. (Just Google Psalms of Lament – it’s quite a list!) He sets a great example of giving it all to the Lord – the good, bad and ugly. The honesty. The protest, the expression of emotions, the voice of confusion.

Laments have a general format:

• An address to God (“Oh, God,…”)
• A review of God’s faithfulness
• A complaint
• A confession of sin or claim of innocence (sometimes not included)
• A request for help
• God’s response (sometimes not included)
• A vow to praise God or a statement of trust

Here’s mine:

Oh Father God, my heart hurts. I know your Word says that You are close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18), and so I trust that You are near. But here in this world, in my present flesh, I feel such sadness. There was such a hole at his house, as the family gathered together to reminisce and share. He was missing! How my heart breaks for his wife, for the loneliness she will feel without him. Grief for his mom, as one never expects to outlive their children. For his kids, whom he adored and had strong relationships with. For the many in the community where he served with joy and kindness to all. Please, God, wrap us in Your loving arms. Hold us close as we mourn. Help us recall his smile, his generosity, his love of You. Help us to press into You when we are feeling overwhelmed with grief. Help me to pray for comfort for his family, on a consistent basis. Give me words to say when they are appropriate. I know, Father, that You understand grief and sorrow and sadness. You understand our pain. I will look to You, the God of all comfort (2 Corinthians 1:3). Thank You that You hear my prayer, and collect my tears. I love you, Lord. In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Writing a lament can be very therapeutic. God can certainly handle our pain, the honest expression of our emotions. He already knows them, but wants us to bring all of our feelings to Him, so that He can help us sort out the truth from any lies we might be believing. He can handle our anger, even if we’re angry at Him. He’s a big God, full of grace and mercy, and He will help us process our emotions if we bring them to Him. Because of Jesus and what He did for us on the cross, we can enter into the throne room with confidence, where we will receive mercy and grace to help us in our time of need (Hebrews 4:16)

If you’re hurting, or confused, or angry, and the emotions feel like they’re overwhelming you, I encourage you to write them out in the form of a lament. If you don’t like to write, consider drawing a picture or painting with watercolors. Express those emotions to the God who loves you completely. He wants to hear from you.

Peggy has been involved with Fresh Hope as a Group Facilitator for 5 years and as the Hope Coach trainer for 3. You can reach her at peggy@freshhope.us

By Scott Box

Leading worship music helped me begin to understand how to manage Bipolar disorder. In the same way, Bipolar disorder gave me a unique angle to evaluate and practice Christian worship—as a way of life. Here are the five gritty practices, born out of desperation, that I use to discover and declare a heroic story about Jesus (and NOT be mastered by sickness):

1. Wrestle God
2. Be HEROic
3. Chop Wood
4. Lift Rocks
5. Make Babies

• WRESTLE GOD—Wrestling with God seems like a stupid or even sinful thing to do. The ancient Hebrew father, Jacob, gained the provision and blessing of confidence that came with having wrestled with God and not “lost.” “You chose to grapple with God, now no man will overcome you.”—Genesis 32:28 (paraphrase). But wrestling with God caused Jacob a wound that he carried with him the rest of his life—he walked with a limp because God popped his hip out of its socket. My wound—Bipolar disorder—made me desperate. Desperation made me dependent on a friendship with Jesus. My friendly dependence on Jesus made me create and repeat a daily rhythm to achieve health. I don’t know if this was the way desperation worked for Jacob, but it is how it worked for me. As I learned to manage my “wound,” I regulated my health by submitting myself to mental boundaries and everyday practicalities like taking medication, healthy nutrition and portion control, even making my bed, brushing my teeth and drinking lots of water. I dedicated myself to lifestyle routines like counseling, exercise, and scripture study. All these disciplines became necessary for balance. And my balance allowed Bipolar disorder to not master me. I gave the Master (the Great Hero, Jesus Christ) control of my mental crisis. I worshiped Jesus through my way of living. My rhythmic management contributed to my health—not perfectly, but rhythmically. Wrestling with God taught me that “God leverages pain (sickness) to point to promise, to provision and to purpose.”
• Be HEROic—To be HEROic means that I pursue and reflect the Great Hero, Jesus Christ, in the way He pursued and reflected God, His Father, the Great Storyteller. In other words, like Jesus, I place my confident HOPE in God’s eternal promises for humanity. I EXPECT God will come through for me in His timing and ways. Hope and expectation give me immeasurable REST. And His rest inspires me to OBEY Him as I work to know and allow Him to know me (even though He already knows me). I use HERO as a daily prayer tool. I express my HOPE and EXPECTATION to accept His REST and proclaim my willingness to OBEY and seek to do His will, not my (sick) will. I can’t be Jesus, but I’m supposed to try—I long to be HEROic. 
• CHOP WOOD—Chopping wood refers to becoming a selfless, obedient servant—I call this type of person an S.O.S., And S.O.S.s tend to ping on the radar of people who do not follow Jesus. At the church our family attends and serves, we literally chop wood as a specific ministry to the poor who cannot heat their homes in Central Oregon. But “chopping wood” also has to do with obeying Jesus’ teachings in the Sermon on the Mount (Mathew 5), doing “God stuff” by giving the fruit and gifts of the Spirit to God and others, being heroic like Jesus is heroic (Galatians 5 and 1 Corinthians 12), being Christlike (Ephesians 4). This means that I long for the heroic image of God to be restored in my life, my story (John 7:35-38)—It is possible. I’ve lived it. I regularly think of being a selfless, obedient servant, S.O.S. in my daily living—from picking up trash on the street to thanking a person with a smile or quietly ignoring an offensive comment. I’m not perfect, but I am far less selfish (sick) than I used to be. I “chop wood.”
• LIFT ROCKS—Lifting rocks involves exploring the unending mysteries of life and eternity with each other. We can pick up stones and explore underneath to widen and expand (health) instead of reduce or neuter (sickness). Lifting rocks has to do with working to shape people’s imagination to create a longing for Jesus. As a music leader and storyteller, I live to “lift rocks” and blow people’s minds with Jesus’ power to transform people into heroes like Him. 
• MAKE BABIES—Making babies is both fun and necessary. Grin. But seriously, I facilitate two things related to lifestyle worship and “making babies:”“Discovery. Declaration.” To put it another way, I have discovered my Rescuer, and I must declare my rescue. The Gospel of Jesus Christ, the Great Hero, does not share itself. God made our stories necessary to tell His story—it is His plan, not ours. “So the woman left her water pot and went into the city, and *said to the people, “Come, see a Man who told me all the things that I have done; this is not the Christ, is He?” They left the city and were coming to Him.”—John 4:28-30 NASB2020. My job is to “make babies” and leave worship healthier for the next generation than my parents’ generation left worship for my generation (sickness). I can leave it healthier when I live in a way that inspires and invites others into Jesus’ grand heroic narrative by sharing my gritty story. I must help people discover and declare Jesus—The woman at the well did. I have learned that telling my story reminds me that I am desperate for Jesus to save the day every day. God changes the heart of people, but I must tell the stories. I tell my story to “make babies,” to replicate myself. I must—Because people will needlessly suffer if I do not (sickness). 

These practices do not encompass the entire Christian experience but serve as handles I regularly grab in my journey with Jesus, to tell a heroic story about Him. They are tools I use to give stability and provide a vantage point to reestablish clarity when Bipolar disorder unbalances me (sickness). These practices are how I prepare to lead worship music and serve others. Ultimately, these practices are how I work to live my worship and become a gritty means to Jesus’ heroic end.

As you learn to integrate your lifestyle of worship into your management of your health, how do you:

1. Wrestle God?
2. Be HEROic (hope, expect, rest, obey)?
3. Chop Wood?
4. Lift Rocks?
5. Make Babies?

I hope these gritty practices become helpful for you as you grapple for wholeness. Maybe they will inspire you to create your practices of your own. No matter what, I pray that your gritty lifestyle of worship will help you manage your health—NOT be mastered by sickness. 

Have a great month discovering and maybe even declaring your gritty story that tells a heroic story about Jesus. —Scott

Scott and Kariann Box live in Redmond, Oregon. Scott serves as Pastor of Development at Shiloh Ranch Church and has been a worship leader for over twenty-five years. Kariann works as a Realtor in Central Oregon and supports Scott’s…creative spirit. They have two children, a one-hundred-pound Labradoodle and a four-pound Shih Tzu without teeth. Scott is the author of HEROIC DISGRACE: Order out of chaos. Hope out of fear. ― A Worship Hero Story 

By Peggy Rice

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

I really needed this verse recently! I had finally confronted an area of sin in my life, a stronghold, of which I felt incredible shame and guilt. I wanted to repent, to turn away, from this behavior, but didn’t think I had the strength. I felt like such a failure. Such a hypocrite! How could a woman who professed Christ as Lord and Savior behave this way? I was embarrassed, and didn’t want anyone to know (that’s the shame talking).

But God knows. And His Word promises that He doesn’t condemn those who belong to Jesus.

 Ah, but the guilt, the shame, the embarrassment! The lies of the enemy were loud in my ear. “You’re such a failure.” “What kind of Christian example are you setting?” “How can you call yourself a leader?” “You can’t do it.” “You’re weak.” “You have no discipline.” “You’ll never get any better.” “This is as good as it gets.” The whispers went on and on.

Mental health challenges are often this way. The enemy lies to us, and tells us that we are unworthy, helpless, useless, of no value to the Kingdom. That things will never get any better. That we are the only one going through this challenge – we are all alone. That life is dark, and we are lost in the gray fog, never to emerge.

When I went through ten years of depression – on and off episodes for all that time – these lies were always with me. They sounded like they were in my head. But my Christian therapist taught me to look at the depression as a separate entity – outside of myself. Like it was a blob sitting on my shoulder, whispering into my ear. So even though those thoughts seemed like they were coming from me, he taught me that those were lies that depression was telling me. I began to separate myself from my depression.

I think this was a key to taking “every thought captive to obey Christ” 2 Corinthians 10:5b

I began to replace these thoughts, as soon as I realized I was thinking them, with the truth of God’s Word.

“You are a new creation.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

“I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13

“And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matthew 28: 20b

“I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5b

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

Condemnation comes from the enemy. Conviction comes from the Holy Spirit. And the difference between these two is huge! One of the roles of the Holy Spirit is to convict us, to draw us closer to God so we can confess to Him. The condemnation that comes from the enemy causes us to run from God. “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.” 2 Corinthians 7:10 and “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.” Galatians 5:1a

We have freedom in Christ. Freedom from the condemnation of the enemy. Freedom from sin, as we walk by the power of the Holy Spirit. Freedom as we repent and confess and turn away from the lies that the enemy – or the mental health challenge – wants us to believe.

We are being shaped into the image of Jesus. And this process is not easy. But we have a Hope – a certain Hope – that Christ died for our sins and for our mental health challenges, and we are promised new life in Christ. He walks with us, even as He shapes us, forms us, convicts us, draws us. And He loves us. “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” Jeremiah 31:3b Maybe you’re going through a time of listening to the lies of the enemy or those of your mental health challenge. Maybe you’re feeling stuck, like you can’t move forward because you’re starting to believe these lies. There is help! Fresh Hope offers Hope Coaching, an opportunity for you to speak to a Hope Coach – a peer – who has been where you are. This Hope Coach wants to listen to your story, to hear where you are stuck, and speak hope into your situation. To get connected to a Hope Coach, follow this link: www.freshhope.us/hope-coach-connector

Peggy has been involved with Fresh Hope as a Group Facilitator for 5 years and as the Hope Coach trainer for 3. You can reach her at peggy@freshhope.us

By K. T. Griffiths

Mother’s Day is approaching and today I had the privilege of visiting my 92 year old mother, who is living in a nursing home. Mom has lived a vibrant life, hosting many of the family parties. She would share encouraging words believing in her children. Her input would give us a sense of independence with a value of self-worth.  Her love was threaded through all of our lives, shared with 3 other siblings.

I hope this Mother’s Day you will remember your mother. But, most importantly share your love and encouragement to your family so one day they will look back on their life and remember the good of who you are.

For Moms who have children with a mental diagnosis, love is a hard line of accepting and forgiving with unconditional love. We are always giving of ourselves and God sees it all. Let us learn to love through His eyes.

May His love shine through you this Mother’s Day,

K.T. Griffiths

K.T. Griffiths offers her first book, a memoir, to all those who face the realities of life and parenting. When one of K,T.’s children was diagnosed with a mental illness, her role as mother was so tried and tested that writing Shhh…Mental Illness, The Silent Disease and sharing her story became a necessity. Known for her wisdom, honesty, and authentic empathy for the plight of others equipped her to explore and share the chaos of the mind amidst life’s relational struggles and help others emerge stronger than before.

By Mark Soppitt

I finished part 1 of Be Kind to Yourself looking at the kindness of God and how He sees us as His children, who are forgiven and set free from the bondage of condemnation and guilt. And yet being a loved child of God goes so much further than that too, as God pours His love into our hearts through the Holy Spirit (Rom.5:5). His Presence in us enables us to flourish in an atmosphere of love, and live life differently. 

It is as though we are seeds God plants in a mineral rich soil, full of Himself, and then He carefully nurtures our growth through our connection with Him and other believers in the church. Over time we increasingly become more like the loving Father who brought us to birth, because we are able to constantly draw on His resources for life. So, what does being planted in mineral rich soil look like and how can we access more of His grace? 

One way we do this is by learning about who God says we are. God is full of kind words about us if we will take time to stop and listen.  As we listen and take these in, it powerfully transforms our way of thinking. I remember the weight of rejection that lifted off my life when I read in the Bible that it was God who “created my inmost being and knit me together in my mother’s womb” (Ps.139:13). No matter the circumstances of our arrival on this earth or maybe the powerful influences that leave us feeling rejected, God is the author of life and He made each one of us. Not one of us was a ‘mistake’ or a ‘chance’ happening. He was involved from the start, just as He will continue to be until the end. That one truth brought me much freedom and joy, and healing to my soul. And there are so many more.

Psalm 139:17-18 says, “How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand.”

An alternative translation of Psalm 139:17 says “How amazing are your thoughts concerning me.” God has an unceasing amount of wonderful and positive thoughts about each one of us and He wants us to know every one of them.

The writer of Psalm 139, King David, experienced many times when life did not go as planned. At times he was chased down, let down, he despaired of life, and he was forsaken. Other times he was the author of his own misfortune, making some of the most terrible mistakes including adultery and murder. The Psalms he pens are full of raw responses to the trials, tribulations, and challenges in his life, and yet also full of incredible insights into the goodness, compassion, and unfailing love of God. In fact, it is often in the difficult times that God reveals Himself most clearly to us. Taking time to drink in God’s thoughts each day can be a great antidote to all the negativity around us in the world.

Here are some truths God speaks over us:

1. I am loved, blessed, and adopted into God’s family (Eph.1:4; Rom.8:14-16)
2. I do not need to fear (Rom.8:15; Heb.13:6)
3. I am a wonderful work of God (Ps.139:14)
4. God takes delight in me and rejoices over me with singing (Zeph.3:17)
5. I have a future that is full of promise (Jer.29:11)
6. I am not alone (Heb.13:5)
7. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Phil.4:13)
8. He will complete the work He began in me (Phil.1:6)

These are just such a small collection of God’s thoughts concerning us. 

How do we replace our old ways of thinking with new positive thoughts and affirmations? How can we show ourselves kindness? Some of these, I mentioned in the first part of this blog. However, I want to remind us of them again.

1. When you feel disturbed inside, slow down and ask yourself, “What am I thinking about myself or my circumstances right now?” Often we don’t recognise what is driving our emotions because we don’t stop to listen. Unmasking our hidden negative self-talk comes when we show kindness by noticing.
2. Take a negative thought and speak out the opposite. In this way you are disrupting the negative highways in your brain and making new, more positive ones. If you feel condemned, speak the truth, “I am not condemned by God and I will not condemn myself.” If you feel like a loser, speak the truth, “I am not a loser. I have been wonderfully made by God and have a great future.” 
3. Don’t beat yourself up. None of us are perfect. We are all a work in progress. Add in the word “yet” to your sentence. So instead of saying, “I am never kind,” say, “I am not as kind as I want to be yet, but I am learning.” 
4. Release yourself from the unreasonable expectations of others and stop “shoulding” on yourself. “Should” is often clothed in shame and guilt. One time in a church I was pastoring a visitor stood up in a service and said we “should all be ashamed of ourselves” for not doing what she thought we “should” be doing. I was quick to kindly and firmly release everyone from the negative weight of those words, which can be so destructive. Recognizing when someone’s expectations are not yours to carry is a great antidote to unnecessary stress. 
5. Instead of using words like “should,” use words like, “I am going to…,” or “I am choosing to…,” or “I am not driven by guilt today.” By doing this you are deciding and taking responsibility for your actions with purpose and agency, rather than guilt or panic.
6. Interrupt the cycle of guilty thoughts in your head. I had a difficult interaction with someone recently and I rehearsed our conversation over and over in my head in a way that was draining away my hope. It took me a while to realise what I was doing, and when I did, I stopped and recognised that the conversation didn’t go so well and then decided I had to let it go. And I made a mental note that I would keep trying to navigate some of our differences with more wisdom and tact next time, whilst not being ruled by this person’s reactions. Sometimes the greatest energy we can release for the future is when we let go of the past. 
7. Journal your uncomfortable interactions with others as a positive way to process, unpack, and grow through them, rather than be overwhelmed by them. The process of writing them down can also be a good way of releasing them, as you imagine letting them go.
8. Ask for help if you feel overwhelmed. Not one of us has all the answers to all the problems we face. We were made to thrive in community. Whilst that is a whole different topic, the maxim, “a trouble shared is a trouble halved” has some truth to it. Many times my anxieties have eased or disappeared because I talked about an issue through with a friend, pastor, or counsellor. 

Is there one way you can start making a choice to be kind to yourself? Start with the easiest way you can do this and not the hardest, and especially not all of them at once. Growing is a process that lasts a lifetime and so we need to pace ourselves to do it one step at a time. Be encouraged by how God thinks about you today. You are the apple of His eye and He delights over you. Ask Him to keep filling you with His Spirit of love to help you in your transformational journey. The best is yet to come. 

Mark lives in Niagara Falls, Canada with his wife, Janet. They have 5 children and a dog and enjoy exercise, public speaking, and motivating others. They have walked through many years of navigating mental illness and its effects on their marriage, their children, and pretty much every aspect of their lives. Through Living Well Coaching, their desire is to connect people to Jesus’ unlimited resources, and help them build resilient, healthy, and fruitful lives that glorify God and reach their full potential. You can follow them on social media: INSTAGRAM @livingwellcoaching; FACEBOOK livingwellcoachingniagara or their website Livingwellcoaching.ca